We can all change the world

We all have the power to change the world, and indeed we all do change the world by our mere presence within it. Every thought we think, choice we make and word we speak alters the course of history. And, right now, I know it’s only reflecting my own current negative frame of mind, but I am hearing so many words of negativity and feeling such a vibration of disempowerment and hopelessness coming at me from all directions. It is overwhelming. Through our current choices we are choosing a future of stasis, suffering, fear and division, maybe even regression. And I know we are better than this.

We have a birth-right to feel joy and happiness, to relish this gift of life that we all have. We have a right to do more than survive, we are here to thrive. Go outside and watch or listen to nature for a while and you will soon appreciate that it positively thrums with life, unapologetic, brazen and wilful. All other species dash joyfully out into each new day or night, working tirelessly to exist to the best of their potential, never worrying about tomorrow. Yet humans alone have lost this spark. It is still there within us, but it needs rekindling. Nature can remind us of this.

Why have we lost this spark? Probably the biggest reason is disconnection. Firstly from the true nature of ourselves, secondly from each other and thirdly from our magnificent planet and life-force, mother Earth. We are gifted with the ability to consciously know ourselves. In theory this should lift us beyond other species. But instead we’ve turned this gift into a weapon, set against not just us, but also our planet and all other species that also depend upon her. This trajectory of comprehensive destruction is tragic insanity.

But, I am not here to trigger yet more fear and foreboding. I am here with a message of hope, which is the truth that I feel beneath my illusory negativity. I sense a change in the air. A structure has to completely crumble so that it can be rebuilt anew, better than before. I think we’re at an historic moment of opportunity – there’s a rumbling undercurrent of rising awareness that we cannot continue on our current path, and soon this undercurrent will erupt into a mass renewal movement of volcanic proportions. But, before the phoenix can rise from the ashes there needs to be one hell of a fire. We’re in that incendiary world now, where it feels too much, it feels bleak and hopeless and we feel we can only be burnt away to dust. But from dust comes new life. We are the fertile ashes and the dust that will create this new future, and we get to choose how this will be. Once we allow that which no longer serves us to burn away, we will find a clean slate. We can press the restart button and start remembering what it feels like to be alive again.

For my part, I want to be part of the solution. I want to help create a joyful future where truth, love, equality and justice reign, through a realisation of the connectivity of everything. This will come about only through a mainstream recognition of the oneness of all existence. Up until now, certainly in recorded history that we are aware of, we have left such realisations to the great sages, visionaries and spiritual seekers, hanging off their words but never quite believing that we could actually attain such realisations for ourselves, every single one of us. We only need to believe that we can, then do the necessary inner work. It is simply a matter of where you place your attention and energy, and I have a sense that, if it becomes a priority for mainstream society, then the process will be hugely accelerated, through a snowball effect of momentum and mutual support.

Through utter disconnection from the truth of who we are, we have forgotten the great power that each of us wields. Each of us creates our own reality. We will blame our surroundings, circumstances and fellows for all of our woes, but at some point we have to take responsibility for our own thoughts, attitudes and behaviour, and then we will notice that the world we inhabit merely reflects this back at us. It is why a naturally optimistic person can have the exact same experience as a pessimistic person, yet the two reports of the experience will be wildly different. The optimist will focus on the positives and will even frame the negatives in positive terms and vice versa. For example, if we are content to allow graphic scenes of distress and horror to enter our living rooms each evening via the televised news, this is only reflecting back what we already feel inside us, and corroborating the world view we have chosen to create and inhabit. If you feel joyful and optimistic about life and humanity, then voluntarily viewing such traumatic, endlessly negative footage will be abhorrent and you will instead seek out joyful experiences, such as spending time in nature or connecting with treasured friends. Either way, the life you experience will continually reinforce your particular world view. It is always our choice, but we have forgotten this.

There is a huge imbalance in the current world towards a very negative, fear-based world view.  To me, this is symptomatic of a pandemic sickness that most of us are suffering deeply from. To cure yourself of the sickness is very difficult alone because of the oppressive, limiting density of the negativity that’s felt all around you. But if we collectively decide to cure ourselves it will be easy. We think we can’t do anything to solve the crisis we feel we’re in. We feel impotent, useless, pathetic, overwhelmed, we have a sense that we humans are fatally flawed and that’s that. But we fail to see that it’s those very thoughts that are creating the crisis. All we need to do is know we always have a choice. Instead, choose to focus on something happy, even if you have to summon a memory from the past, and immediately you affect the planetary imbalance of negative energy and your world will reflect this back to you if you’re observant.

It’s a new habit we must all get into.  It’s always hard changing engrained old habits but when we change together we can support each other. Our current habit is to assume the worst, to act from a place of fear, and all those other manifestations of fear, such as hate, anger, jealousy, shame, false pride, aggression, spite, harsh judgement, intolerance etc. Instead we just need to make a habit of choosing love in all its forms – appreciation, nurturing, care, kindness, compassion, empathy, laughter, joy, playfulness, gratitude etc. It sounds childishly simple, but this is how we change the world. The choice and power lies forever in our thoughts, words and actions.


We are all a mystery

It’s the most beautiful spring day and I’m sad. Why? I see the happy daffodils, bobbing in the gentle breeze. I feel the sun burning through a cloudy haze, touching my winter-pale skin with blissful warmth. I hear the birds sing for joy and I smell blossom and the sweet crush of newly mown grass on the air. I should feel so happy today.

And, on one level of my being I do. But there’s another layer I’m painfully aware of, and I can’t work out if it’s deeper or more superficial, but certainly it’s shouting more loudly right now, and it is a very familiar voice indeed. This layer is sad and flat, hopeless even. ‘Take me away from here,’ it asks. ‘Beam me up,’ it prays, as I look up at all the aeroplane trails in the bright blue sky.

I am a strange paradox of eternally optimistic and plagued by a melancholy, which could quite easily spiral down towards the abyss of depression if I let it. I simultaneously always see the best in people yet feel depressed by humanity’s self-created plight of disconnection, selfishness, laziness and soporific amnesia. I feel like I’m spiritually awakening at a rapid pace, yet feel increasing despair at the world in which I live, which clearly shows me I am very far from fully awakened. I feel stuck at a half-way house, a foot in neither world. And I feel very alone here a lot of the time, but suspect that’s not the case at all, which is why I feel drawn to writing this blog. I hope to reach out to others who may feel they are alone in a confusing place on their awakening journey, and say, ‘Hi, I’m here too.’ And I hope to hear voices calling, ‘Hi’ to me too. Together we are stronger.

There is such a human need to be ‘seen’, to be understood. And we are also naturally sociable, naturally drawn to share experiences with others.  Solitude is rather an illusory concept – we always remain connected to each other on some level, whether it’s through procuring our means for survival, or through the thoughts in our mind constantly straying to past memories or future fantasies about those we love (or those we despise), even when we’re trying our very best to be alone.

So, I put this post out into the ether in the spirit of connection. We are all a mystery, each one of us. And we are all beautiful, each one of us. We all deserve to be happy, content and to feel loved and ‘seen’ in our truth.  So, I see you, and you are wonderful… 🙂

‘Coming out’ about ETs

OK, here goes. The reason I wanted to set up a new blog site, separate from my existing frond yoga site, is because I have been experiencing all kinds of strange things over the last few years, which took a turn for the even weirder around a year ago, when ET experiences first entered my life. But I have been far too shy/confused/embarrassed to ‘come out’ about what I have been experiencing, except to those who I feel may understand and who won’t try and persuade me to see a psychiatrist! Luckily, as my experiences develop and as my own self-confidence grows, I have been able to share more and more, and now I feel ready to ‘put it out there’. The reason I have chosen to do so is partly because I believe that what I am receiving is helpful to our species and our planet. Also, I am coming to realise that there are many other people out there who are having similar experiences and I know from my own journey how frightening/confusing/alienating (lol!) these experiences can feel, and so I would like to reach out to others and reassure you – I hear you, you’re not going mad, this is real!

Of course, I caveat that by saying there is a whole load of fake information out there. But, one thing my recent experiences have given me is a razor-sharp authenticity radar. It was pretty good already but it’s pretty damn hot now, so I can spot artifice a mile off and I resonate with authenticity and truth with an acuteness that is sometimes painful in its beautiful intensity, especially given it is such an incredibly rare commodity in this crazy world we live in. I am quite obsessed by truth (and the lack of it in our lives) actually, but more on that another time.

Anyway, until last June, I had never given much thought to ETs, beyond assuming there has to be a hell of a lot more life out there than that which resides upon our tiny little planet,  having a big appetite for the mysterious and unknown, plus a great love of star-gazing. So, when I met a girl who claimed to channel ETs in Portugal last year, I was puzzled how very drawn I was to her. I assumed she would be a bit crazy, but was very intrigued indeed about what she would say, and I asked her to give me a reading.

She held my hands in hers and closed her eyes. Soon she opened them and smiled at me. ‘You have an ET guide,’ she said, then proceeded to give me his name, where he was from, and an eerily accurate channelled message from him.  The strangest thing was that I had a big emotional response to this. It felt like coming home. Something huge, held deep within me, finally let go, like my soul was heaving a big sigh of relief.

Anyway, I won’t go into all the details of what happened after this right now, although I am writing up my story separately, and will share this as I go. But, suffice to say, life has taken on its own momentum since then. I very much feel part of a grand scheme, which I know is operating in alignment with the highest good and is driven by unconditional love, peace and harmony and, in essence, is all about helping us humans to evolve, at a time when we are reaching an evolutionary cross-roads. Do we man-up (actually this is an ironic phrase, and should probably read ‘woman-up’ for reasons I will no doubt bang on about in future posts) and commit to releasing the old paradigm of ego neediness and selfish agendas so that we can evolve to the next level of our potential, whereby the collective takes precedence over the individual, and whereby love rules above all else? Or do we continue to exist in our current nonsensical state of enslavement, ignorance and suffering?

For myself, I am learning to trust and go with the flow and I know that the single best thing I can do to help things along is to just keep working on myself to purify stale, negative belief patterns, clear old karma and keep raising my vibrations and expanding my consciousness. I know that when I try and second-guess and ‘control’ things (i.e. when I get stuck in my mind and ego) then life doesn’t flow as well, but when I surrender with humble gratitude to these greater forces then life can be unbelievably sweet.

As anyone doing the inner work knows, it’s certainly not an easy path. Releasing stale belief patterns is terrifying, exhausting and extremely difficult and we have to acknowledge and live within the toxicity of what we’re bringing into consciousness before we can release it. But it’s the most exciting, liberating and endlessly fascinating path too.  I feel I am growing into more of what I can be, and gradually appreciating that there’s no limit on this – we only have to imagine with enough intensity we can be something and it’s possible. It sounds glib but it’s true and anyone who commits to the path will come to the same realisation eventually.

Anyway, I would like to end this post with what was channelled to me today.  I receive information through my writing whenever I ask for it and am in the right head-space to receive it. I also receive messages without prompting at night before sleep, and also through lucid dreams.  I have spent a long time beating myself up about this, telling myself it’s my imagination, or I am clearly insane. But I don’t listen to that dark censor anymore as it only creates fear within me, not love, which is not helpful to me.  The channelled wisdom resonates as truth within my body, and that’s all the evidence I need.

It certainly feels like I am communicating with an entity outside of myself, especially when I receive technological information which makes no sense to my rational mind (I am no scientist) but feels like truth within my cellular being. But I don’t claim to fully understand this at all, and am also quite happy to accept it’s coming from a ‘higher’ part of my multi-dimensional self. My sense is that, ultimately, it doesn’t matter what the source of the information is, because we are all connected on some level, we are all one, the inner is the same as the outer.

Yet, within this bigger picture, I also have come to believe without any doubt that there are other entities far more evolved than us out there in our infinite universe – how could there not be? It would be supremely arrogant, not to mention limiting, to believe that our species is the evolutionary pinnacle of what is possible at this time, especially given the mess we seem to be making of things at present. And I believe many of these entities are trying to help us at this critical time in our evolution and will respond to anyone putting out a strong intention to evolve and awaken – they are our cosmic brothers and sisters, just as we are all human brothers and sisters. Connection between hearts is infinite. But, I caveat this by saying these are just my experiences and words, and you need to find your own truth. Above all this is what I believe- we all have to find our own way to our truth, and not give our power over to anyone else who claims to tell you your truth.

I guess I think we can’t possibly even scratch the surface of the mysteries of our existence at our current level of consciousness, although the more we raise our consciousness the greater the imprint our scratch can make. But it’s still a faint scratch. We can only be sure that we don’t have a blinking clue what’s going on really and that, even when we’re knocking at the farthest reaches of what our current consciousness will allow us to comprehend, the only thing we can be truly sure of is that the unknown lies beyond this, to be brought into consciousness when we evolve sufficiently – and I don’t think this process ever ceases. But we can commit to finding out what is our current truth in this moment of time, at this level of consciousness, knowing that our truth will change and grow as we do. But if the truth that you feel is governed by justice, love, peace, equality, harmony and other universal qualities like these, then you are probably barking up the correct tree.  I do also believe that there are simple, universal truths that we all have within us, and we all just create stories around these to try and understand them. So my ET take on things might just be a story. But it is what feels like truth to me at the moment, and that’s all I can share at the end of the day, and I do intend to share more of it in the future.

Channelled message from higher self/ET guide – 6th April 2017

I am here to bring through the following message: ‘To live in truth, love, unity, peace, harmony and equality. To raise our vibrations as a species, in order to transcend the ego and move into unity consciousness where the collective rules, not the individual. This is the next step on our evolutionary path. We can go there, we can do this, but we have to really want to and we have to each put in the work. But a group effort will build momentum like a snowball, drawing more and more into the group energy field and making the process easier and easier as we go. It is our destiny, and we know it deep down within our hearts, which is why the collective energy will grow quickly once enough pioneers begin the movement. But we do need the masses on board. This is a collective endeavour. Otherwise our species will die out soon. And this is OK, species die out all the time. Our souls are eternal, we can return to a body if we wish. But if we don’t choose to evolve now, at this point in history when conditions are ripe for it, then we have to go through the pain of a three-dimensional existence all over again until the next opportunity arises.

This stuff can’t be proven at your current level of consciousness. But if you commit to expanding your consciousness you will feel it for yourself, every one of you. We all have limitless potential on how much we can expand our consciousness, but each of us has to want to do so and has to put the effort in. No other can do it for us.

Free will is a universal law. And this is why higher intelligence is assisting your planet right now – because the free will of your people has been compromised by dark forces, which seek to lower your vibration and restrict your consciousness. They would have you regress rather than evolve, so that you can remain enslaved and perpetuate the current hierarchy. This is against universal law and therefore needs to rebalance. This is what is creating the ripe conditions for evolution of your species right now – the universe is rebalancing itself, to come back to the natural flow. Everyone must choose – do you focus your energies on perpetuating the current paradigm of unnatural enslavement and suffering, or do you answer the universal call for peace, love and harmony, and instead focus your energy on raising your vibration and helping others to do the same? It is this simple.

(Share this, Becky. We need your voice.)

Crystal clarity

A crystal has clarity, transparency, multi-faceted beauty. It sparkles and glitters with the light that it contains. Its irregular outer belies the sacred regularity of its inner world. It has great strength and endurance. It flowers its petals beneath the ground. It needs no audience. It just is. Radiating purity and light into the world, for the sake of nothing but creation. Its life is undiluted by projection; it is a paradox of self-containment and universal radiance.

But even the crystal, one day, will turn back to dust.  And I too come from dust and will return to dust. So I like to think that, in the deepest nook of my heart, there lies a crystal that needs no audience, that just is.


We only need our own validation


I used to care so much about what others thought about me. I just wanted to be liked by everyone. This meant I moulded myself into the person I thought people wanted me to be, which of course was quite an act to keep on top of, as every person wants something different.  But I was very good at this game – this is one of the ‘benefits’ of being a highly sensitive type. I am very able to detect other people’s moods, emotions and expectations, and able to pander to these admirably.  This is great for getting on with people, finding partners and friends, doing well in your career etc – basically anything that’s dependent on relationships, which most things are. But it is an absolute disaster in terms of your relationship with yourself, and therefore ultimately a disaster for every other aspect of your life, as the superficial pretence can’t be maintained forever. Understandably, by changing myself depending on who I was with, I completely lost all sense of who I was in the end.

I remember when I eventually realised I was unravelling spectacularly and found a counsellor, he used to ask me about my feelings and I couldn’t answer him. I would delve inside and find… nothing. A blank, a void. I felt like I didn’t exist, like I wasn’t a ‘real’ person. Which, I suppose, I wasn’t most of the time – instead I was a brilliantly crafted version of a whole raft of different personalities, depending on who I was with.

So, that’s why this blog has been a long time coming.  I suppose until now I’ve still cared too much about what others think to put myself on the line, as it were, in a exposed position where I am fully aware that it’s likely many people will disagree with my thoughts.  Until now, the thought of anyone not thinking highly or approving wholeheartedly of me has been too much to bear and I have tended to avoid confrontational situations at all costs. It’s been a long old journey coming to a place where I value speaking my truth above likeability and above needing external validation. I’d be lying to say I don’t care at all – of course I would love to be understood and respected for my views.  But now I realise the egoic limitations of hiding my truth for the sake of being liked – it is but fear holding me back. Instead, I have come to an understanding that I only need to validate myself. Any other external validation is a secondary bonus.

So, my usual self-audit is to check whether my writing is coming from a place of current personal truth and an intention to spread love and self-empowerment. If it is, then I give it my personal stamp of validation. If not, then it’s back to the drawing board. Sometimes the answer isn’t clear, and I’m sure I won’t always get it right.  But these days I know that, if I only have to answer to myself, then I’m OK either way, as I have learnt to forgive myself for any perceived mistakes.  There are in fact no mistakes, only learning opportunities for growth.

I would also say that, given my social chameleon credentials, it’s been a long journey towards being able to tune into my personal truths.  Once I realised my self-destructive pattern of people-pleasing, there then followed a few years of getting to myself again, which was painful and joyful in equal measures, and unbelievably liberating.  The journey continues, as I believe the depth of our relationship with ourselves has no limit.  We gradually uncover layer after layer of illusion, coming ever closer to the true light that we are. It’s a life work, and the most endlessly fascinating and fulfilling one at that. Becky May, it’s a pleasure to be getting to know you finally!

I encourage you to delve within today and find out something new about yourself… 🙂


Where on earth to begin?

Having decided to begin a new blog, with honesty at its centre, whereby I can share my personal truths, I am now utterly bewildered as to where to begin.  So, I take a deep breath, appeal to my higher self and receive the following answer: ‘It’s the simplest thing in the world, Becky. Just speak your truth in this moment, always.’ So, I will just begin writing, to see what truth flows out at this moment in time – my best writing is always my spontaneous, uncensored truth of a moment.

Why is it so hard to speak our truth in this world we live in? Why are we so threatened by truth or, worse, so disconnected from truth that we no longer recognise it as such? We all possess the most formidable authenticity radar within us. It’s our gut instinct, our innate intuition, the sixth sense, whereby we detect someone’s energetic even before they speak, or we feel the energy of a place as soon as we enter. Yet most of us have lost our connection with this very natural part of our make-up.  It is very evident in animals, whose existence hasn’t been overlaid with the meaningless complexities that our own lives have, the ‘stories’ that disguise, muddle and hide the simplest truths.

Those who are naturally more sensitive and therefore still in tune with their inner truth radar, or those who reconnect with it through dedicated inner work, often struggle to get on in the world. Why? Partly because the existence of this hugely important part of us is pretty much scorned and denied in the modern, western world therefore there’s a lack of validation for those experiencing their own deep connection to it and resultant confusion, and partly because, where it is acknowledged, it is often wrapped up in all kinds of mystical nonsense or lauded as being a particular gift of the spiritual elite when, really, it’s part of our very basic human condition, one which we used to rely on for survival.

Well, I would argue that, once more, we humans need to connect to this extra sensory awareness, for our survival.  It is our disconnection from it that has brought us to this seemingly nonsensical situation, where as a species we are following a path that will lead to our own self-destruction, probably not too far into the future now, even when we know, through deeply uneasy pit of our belly sensations, this to be the case.  Why don’t we fight against this situation? Because we feel powerless.  But this is because we have forgotten the huge power that lies within us.  And rediscovering the fullness of what we are capable of, of which reconnecting to our full sensory awareness and intuitive powers is but the tip of the iceberg, is the only way we will reverse this crazy trajectory.

I will be talking a lot about truth in my blog posts. I will also be talking a lot about the current planetary imbalance between male and female energies, which is a huge factor in our current disconnect with an entire side of our being. We live in a very unbalanced world, where male energy massively dominates.  Male energy is about doing, thinking, goals and achievements.  Female energy is about being, feeling, receiving, and the process rather than the end results. Our intuitive powers, visionary creativity and connections to the ‘unseen’ elements of life are the realm of female energy. It is through a long history of female suppression that this less tangible side of our condition has apparently almost been erased, now so often the subject of scorn of ridicule by the mainstream. Yet this is to all of our detriment. We all have male and female energies within us – this is the universal wisdom of yin and yang.  To feel happy, we have to have balanced our personal energies, yet most of us, both men and women, have suppressed our female energy big-time, and we all suffer for this, individually and collectively.  Furthermore, it is the disastrously weak female energy of the planet that has allowed us to come to this nonsensical point in history, where through not being in touch with our feeling side enough, we have lost touch with our connection with our planet. We fail to understand that when we harm mother earth we harm ourselves.

For sure, we need both energies – neither is more important than the other. But, right now, the thing that’s going to save us and our planet is a huge surge in female energy, and we all need to take personal responsibility to make this happen.  We need to get touchy-feely again.  We need to stop thinking that love is a dirty word.  We need to re-frame sex into the expression of divine love and mutual respect that it’s supposed to be.  We need to stop ‘doing’ for a while and get back in touch with our emotions and just enjoy and explore ‘being’.  Note your response to this paragraph. Do you feel uncomfortable prickles on the back of your neck?  If so, this is a symptom of the imbalance of our planet, the fact that we find the prospect of exploring emotions so threatening and challenging.  To truly explore emotions requires truth and courage, which brings me back to my original question about why truth is so rare these days – and I mean pure, authentic truth.  We are scared of it. We feel it will expose us, make us vulnerable. Yes it will, but vulnerability is a beautiful thing. Vulnerability is our salvation.

And, as one last point for today, I do not consider myself a feminist. For a start, I resist labels wherever possible as they immediately imply division, unless the labels are a description of something universal, such as oneness or unity.  As such, if a label is required, I would say I’m an ‘equalitist’, in that I believe each and every one of us is as important as the next, regardless of gender or anything else. I believe we are all jointly responsible for the situation we’re currently in – how can we not be? It’s true that male energy is overtly more powerful, but female energy is just as powerful, in a very different and perhaps even more potent way, and therefore we all have to take responsibility for finding ourselves out of balance, individually and globally.  Therefore we each of us now has to take personal responsibility to rebalance our own male-female energies, but I do concede that, as a surge of female energy is required at this time, the onus is likely to be more on women than men to initiate and develop this surge as, in general, we women are more than likely to have a natural tendency towards a domination of female energy within us.

Certainly, this has been the journey I have been on over the last few years, as I sought to rediscover and embrace my female softness and intuitive powers.  The results have been remarkable, and I will share more of my story in future blog posts.

But, enough from me for one day. Haha, having struggled to know how to begin, I am now struggling to end the post! I take this as a good sign… 🙂

Have a beautiful day. xx